Tag Archives: God

Godly Friendships and the Bible

Godly Friendships and the Bible

 

What does the Bible say about Godly friendships? What does the Bible say about how we are to conduct ourselves once we have found ourselves in a Godly friendship? We can be certain that there are principles to be found in the Bible relating to this important message and how we can be sure our friendships are God-honoring, personally edifying to the glory of God, and sanctifying to both individuals.

First and most importantly we are told in Ecclesiastes 4:12 that a close Godly friendship is essential in our Christian walk. It is not really an option if we want to be successful and victorious in our Christian living.

“A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back to back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple braided cord is not easily broken.” (NLT)

 

A Godly friend is necessary if we hope to stand firm against the Enemy’s attacks. Without that companionship we are made weaker. So, once we have found that Godly friend/s, how are we to act within that friendship? Will it always be perfect since all people involved are “Godly” and seeking Him first with their whole hearts? What happens in real life within the parameters of these friendships?

1-Face to Face Fellowship

“The Lord would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his friend.” Exodus 3:11 (NIV)

In this day and age this simple concept is quick to be overlooked. We text, we type, we email. Rarely do we meet face to face in real time fellowship with our friends. Can you imagine God texting Moses? Did you laugh? It sounds ludicrous doesn’t it? You might argue that this is the day and age we live in, and while there is truth in that statement, there is even greater truth in the words we read in Exodus. Friends see each other face to face. Let’s face it, when we can talk to each other and see each other’s facial expressions, hear each other’s tones, it lends itself to a lot less misinterpretation, misunderstanding, hurt feelings…etc. (Why didn’t she text me back? Why hasn’t she emailed me in 3 days? She hasn’t called me back, I know she must be mad, I better call so and so and talk about it!) Let’s commit to getting back to basics within our Godly friendships and just have some coffee (or tea or whatever!) and have some real fellowship, because that is how true Godly friendships are cultivated in a healthy way.

2-Influential

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” Proverbs 27:17 (NLT)

It’s very clear from this simple verse that those we choose to keep company with will influence our attitudes. Whether that’s in a Godly way or in a worldly way depends on those we spend time with. Proverbs is full of wisdom written by the wisest man on the earth, and we would do well to listen to the advice given when choosing that Godly friend. If we have our radar set on someone, we should ask ourselves, is this person going to influence me towards the character of Christ? Will this person be “sharpening” me into the fruits of the Spirit or the lusts of the flesh?

3-Openly Honest and Always Sincere

“An open rebuke is better than hidden love! Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.” Proverbs 27:5-6 (NLT)

Sometimes even our best intentions are hurtful. The fact of the matter is this: even in the closest and Godliest of friendships, people are going to get hurt. This proverb tells us as much. It also tells us that this “friendly fire” is better than an enemy who merely pretends to be nice to your face while speaking blasphemies behind your back. I think we all know what it feels like to be betrayed in this way. You find out this person who you know and trusted has been gossiping about you, spreading hurtful rumors about you all the while pretending to be something totally different to your face. We are warned about this person, this person is double-minded, and not to be trusted. The friend who wounds us in their sincerity is much more desirable.  You can be reminded that even this wounding is a blessing! Your Godly friend is being honest and sincere as God has designed! Not that it makes the hurt any less painful…but we will deal with that.

4-Loves at All Times

“A friend loves at all times.” Proverbs 17:17

Here we have the first solution to our issue of hurts. Love. It doesn’t say “A friend loves when it feels good”, or “A friend loves until he is hurt”, it states very clearly “all times”.  Love is an action, and it is a choice. Love is not a feeling in the context of this verse. There comes a point when the hurts are going to be so deep, perhaps the pain so intense that love will not come easily, and it may not seem possible. The most logical choice may seem to move on and be done with the whole mess. It is at this moment we are faced with a crucial choice-will we love at any cost? This is the Godly friend that you want in your life! This love has no strings attached, it is unconditional, and is not related to circumstances. It is the love that Jesus has for us, and the love He tells us to have for each other.

5-Forgives First

“This is how I want you to conduct yourself in these matters. If you enter your place of worship and, about to make an offering, you suddenly remember a grudge a friend has against you, abandon your offering, leave immediately, go to this friend and make things right. Then and only then, come back and work things out with God.” Matthew 5:23-24 (The Message)

Loving through hurts must involve forgiveness. This passage could not possibly be interpreted any other way then to forgive first before bringing your worship to God. God is not interested in your lip service when you have outstanding debts of bitterness against your friends. Settle all accounts before offering your praises to God! He sees our hearts, knows our thoughts, whether or not we like it! There is no way around this one. If we are hurt by the actions or words of another, we need to speak up and be honest and sincere always of how we feel, in love. Our feelings are valid, and our friend’s feelings are valid. We need to be heard, and they need to be heard, and we need good communication in order to have Godly friendships that glorify and edify each other towards love and good works! When we fail to communicate in a timely manner we allow the hurt to fester as we turn it over in our minds, often making things bigger than they are, and further misinterpreting the situation, so by the time we do talk about it, emotions are really running high. It makes things that much harder to be made right. These are the times we are tempted by our Enemy to “end” relationships. We are whispered lies that we must give up on this friendship, that it wasn’t what we thought, it wasn’t the right person, we were wrong, we failed again, we messed up again, we better just start over with someone who agrees with us on everything we believe in or hold to so as to avoid any problems. That is when we need to hold fast to the TRUTH of God’s Word, and what He says about Godly friendships. If we have already determined that the friendship we are in is an “iron sharpening iron” friend for Godly character then we must go back to our principles laid out under such a friendship. Am I loving, am I being honest, am I forgiving. Have I laid aside all my offerings to run to this person and make things right? Have I done all I can do to bring restoration, or am I insisting on being right and is that getting in the way of peace? I think the most important question here even than all of that is: am I honoring God in my decision to end this, or would He want me to obey His own command in Matthew 5:23-24? That seems rather clear. (There are SOME exceptions where relationships do need to end because of excessive sinful lifestyles or rebellion…etc, but for the sake of our discussion, I am not referring to those specific incidences.)

6-Sacrifices

“Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” John 15:13 (NIV)

Jesus as our Friend made the ultimate sacrifice for our sin, the price we could never pay. He gave His life, so we could have eternal life with Him. With this He modeled His idea of the Godly friendship for us. The true Godly friend is one who sacrifices without question. I’m not just talking about the sacrifice of taking a bullet for your friend in some “what if” scenario that will likely never occur. I am talking about the much smaller things, but perhaps more difficult. The sacrifices of time: the middle of the night phone calls, the house calls, the food delivered when sick, the trips to the hospitals, the sleepless nights, the hours of Bible study when your friend has a crisis and needs an answer, calloused knees from hours of earnest prayer….on and on it goes. These are the sacrifices of life that the true Godly friend gives without a blink of an eye. This person is selfless, and giving, and authentic. This is the person you want as your Godly friend, helping you on your journey of sanctification. If you have this person in your life, thank them, and pray for them! Because you have an Enemy who wants to destroy the beautiful relationship that God has joined together. Satan knows you are stronger together, and it scares him!

Remember to keep up the face to face contact with your dear friend to avoid that confusion and misinterpretation of email and text that may occur, especially in the early stages of a growing relationship. Ask God to help you have the Christ-like influence on your friend that you desire them to have on you, and commit to always being openly honest and sincere no matter how difficult that may be. Ask the Holy Spirit to guide you in speaking the truth in love at all times. Face to face is best! Throughout everything, choose to love and forgive quickly. As you reflect on building your own character, ask God to help you continue to become the sacrificial friend that He modeled for us in His Word. Putting the needs of our friend first, and truly esteeming each other better than ourselves. In this way we can cultivate our Godly friendship deeper and draw closer to our Creator in unity.

A Godly You+ Your Godly Friend+God Himself=A Triple Braided Cord Not Easily Broken!

Let’s Talk FAITH

Let’s Talk FAITH

“Faith is choosing to believe the Bible is true regardless of circumstances, emotions, or cultural trends.”- Life Builders (Campus Crusade For Christ)

As I find myself falling deeper in love with my Creator, I become consistently overwhelmed with His incredible hand of design and care over every detail of my life. I find myself in a constant state of marvel and worship, always with a song on my heart bursting from my lips. However, it’s not always peaches and roses. As I draw closer in divine intimacy with my Eternal Lover, I become acutely aware of the desperate failing health of hearts around me. Most notably are those of the ones I love most. While I am experiencing, and living a peace beyond compare, and a purpose that literally puts a spring in my step, my closest family members are often the ones suffering the deepest pains as they stagger through life aimlessly. Desperate and hopeless; if nothing else with the appearance of merely existing, which in and of itsef is its own horror. God is orchestrating the symphony of my life and creating the most joyous music I have ever known, and yet my own loved ones wander in darkness. I find I’m tempted to wonder why they don’t want this glorious life so freely offered to them, the life they know of in their heads, yet refuse in their hearts.

I was finally brought to my spiritual knees as I had to face face my precious Jesus, my Champion who has gone before me and continues to intercede for me daily working on my behalf-I had to admit to Him that while I may have faith to move mountains and trust Him to provide all my needs I had major doubts about the hearts of the ones closest to me, and whether they would ever change. Would they ever want to change? Why don’t they want freedom? Who wouldn’t want it?

Ah, but no surprise to my Friend, for He knows my every thought and concern. Any more prayers for these “loved ones” filled with doubt would simply be a wasted breath. It was an honest release necessary for me to see my own spiritual weakness of faith (or lack thereof). And I implored with my God earnestly.

Why, Jesus, why? Why do I trust You to provide my every need? Why do I trust You with the life of my daughter and even the most impossible of tasks and yet to change a couple of hearts I pray with cynicism and doubt with much wavering. (James 1:6) So I sat back and listened. Literally, with my eyes closed, hands lifted, and repeating:

“Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in Him.”

Psalm 62:5 (NLT)

It seemed like an eternity as His love enveloped me, He wrapped me in His gentle presence. No guilt trips for my bluntness. It was my honesty that He desired, not as if He needed it, but it was for my benefit. I knew He would speak to me in His time. I waited.

He took me back to a place thousands of years ago. It was a heart wrenching scene to be sure. Jesus could have come sooner to save Lazarus, but chose not to. It was not the will of the Father. It didn’t make sense to everyone else. Lazarus died, and had been dead 4 days. Jesus tells them to roll the stone away from the tomb and initially Martha balks at the idea, noting the horrible stench they would encounter from the corpse. However, something deep withing her remembers. She knows who the ultimate authority is, and her spirit submits to the process that on the surface appears to be illogical. She says,

“Even now I know God will give you whatever you ask.”

John 11:22 (NLT)

Does she know the outcome of this story? Of course not! She does know that Jesus can ask anything of His Father, and she truly believes whatever happens is for their greatest good. (And she had never even read Romans 8:28!)

Jesus responds to her simple act of faith with a statement that initially seems to be unrelated:

“I am the resurrection and the life. Anyone who believes in me will live, even after dying. Everyone who lives in me and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this, Martha?”

John 11:25-26 (NLT)

Looking into the eyes of her Savior she is questioned. Do you believe? I am life, do you believe? You will never die, do you believe? Life is more than your physical body, do you believe? I came so you could have life abundantly, do you believe?

She could look Him straight in the eyes and say truthfully, honestly:

“Yes, Lord.”
John 11:27

And what happens next is the real meat and potatoes of the story:

The doubters (all of us-or is it just me?) say:

“This man healed a blind man. Couldn’t he have kept Lazarus from dying?”

John 11:37

Or as we like to put it: God, I know You can change this situation and I want to trust You, but I’m really having a hard time. It’s coming across to me as if you enjoy watching me suffer. I’m starting to lose heart here. I’m not sure about that thing called “faith”, especially when these circumstances are less than appealing.

Jesus responds:

“‘Didn’t I tell you that you would see God’s glory if you believe?’

So they rolled the stone aside. Then Jesus looked up to heaven and said, ‘Father, thank You for hearing me. You always hear me, but I said it out loud for the sake of all these people standing here, so they will believe You sent me.’ Then Jesus shouted, ‘Lazarus, come out!’ And the dead man came out…”

John 11:40-44 (NLT)

And so it happened. The big light bulb clicked on and a little more of God’s truth was illuminated in the depths of my wayward heart that night. Everything, even down to the smallest detail has a purpose. Do I believe that? Yes, I do. And I know what that purpose always is: bringing glory to Jesus Christ and His Father in heaven. Can He change hearts? Of course He can! Do I believe He can use every choice (good or bad) that my loved ones make (or I make!) for their greatest good and for His ultimate glory? You bet I do!

Yes, Jesus, I do believe.

When the enemy tells me my prayers are pointless because “they’ll never change anyways”, I can tell Satan to get lost because with my God, the Only True God, the God of Life, ALL things are possible, and that is the truth my soul rests on!

“For we live by believing, and not by seeing.”

2 Corinthians 5:7 (NLT)

“And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to Him must believe…”

Hebrews 11:6 (NLT)

“Faith is the confidence that what we ask for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.”

Hebrews 11:1 (NLT)

And so you’re loving Comforter asks you to be sincere with Him. Where do you lack faith? It’s there right now, and you can hear Him calling out to you to lay it at His feet. Ask Him to simply help you’re “unbelief”. One of the most beautiful prayers you can utter and He wants to hear it is this:

“I believe; help thou my unbelief!”

Mark 9:24 (KJV)

It’s the best place to start! When you can be honest before you’re Maker and allow Him to build you’re faith one small brick at a time, you’ll soon find yourself rejoicing passionately:

“Satisfy [me]…with Your unfailing love, so [I] may sing for joy to the end of [my] life.”

Psalm 90:14 (NLT)

Do you believe?

Delight, Desire…Worship

Delight, Desire….Worship

 “I tell you the truth, my Father will give you whatever you ask in My name.

Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete.”

John 16:13 (NIV)

 “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”

Psalm 37:4 (NIV)

 “Whom have I in heaven but You?

I desire You more than anything.”

Psalm 73:25 (NLT)

“Only as we truly delight in God is it safe to give us our desires, for then they are not likely to become idols. And by our delighting in God, He heals our false desires as our souls come true in light of their Maker. Worship becomes the means by which we most deeply heal our desire.

Worship is the act of the abandoned heart adoring its God.

Simply showing up for church on Sunday is not even close to worship. Neither does singing songs with religious content pass for worship. What counts is the posture of the soul involved, the open heart pouring forth its love toward God and communing with Him. It is a question of desire.

Worship occurs when we say to God, from the bottom of our hearts, ‘You are the One whom I desire.'” –

John Eldredge (Desire)

As we come together week after week to bring “worship” to the congregation I believe it becomes imperative that we must first ask God to search our own hearts and motives and show us our inner most desires. Can we say to God, in all honesty that He is our only desire, above all else? How can we express true worship to our brothers and sisters in the congregation if our own hearts are not in the right place? It becomes clearer that just showing up on Sunday (and Wednesday) with our “talents” is not enough. The people need to see us fully abandoned before God, every Sunday. The only way we can do that is if we are delighting in Him every other day of the week.

Glory Revealed

Glory Revealed

God’s first great glory was seen in the act of Creation; namely man in His own image:

“So God created man in His own image. In the image of God He created him; male and female he created them.” Genesis 1:27-NIV

God’s greatest glory then came through His Son in human flesh:

“[The Word became human and made His home among us.] We have seen His glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” John 1:14 [NLT] NIV

Through His unconditional capacity to love His creation, He desired for man to reflect the glory of Himself.

“We, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into His likeness with ever increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.”

2 Corinthians 3:18-NIV

Wrap your head around this truth: you are the glory of God revealed! He created us to be a manifestation of His very likeness, and that “glory” means a lot more than merely an hour in church on Sunday morning singing songs that “glorify God”. It means that our very being is a glorification of God Himself! When He created us, it was in His own image, to glorify Him! My friends, this is a truth that will change your life, if you can grasp it! Ask Him to help you understand even a portion of what it implies for you and your life.

“I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” Romans 8:18-NIV

When we see our precious Savior face to face, our glory will finally be complete! We will see it fully revealed, which implies that much of it is hidden from us at the present moment. I imagine some of the reason for this is to protect us from the downfall our pride would cause us. Certainly God only transforms us into His likeness one step at a time for a reason, otherwise we’d all be perfect upon Salvation.

No, there is definitely glory in the process. The sanctification of our hearts brings glory, and makes us a better reflection of Him. I like how the New Living Translation puts it:

“The Lord-who is the Spirit-makes us more and more like Him as we are changed into His glorious image.” 2 Cor. 3:18

Go take a look in the mirror. You are no accident. You were made in God’s glorious image! Do you understand what this means? Are you beginning to grasp, even a little, just how much God cares about You, His creation? Have you ever heard the saying, “A man/woman after my own heart”? Well, that’s what we’re talking about here, only to a far greater level. More then we could ever begin to comprehend. And let me mention, none of this is based on, or has anything to do with your performance! None of it! (But that is a whole other issue!)

The next time you hear that voice of self-loathing, doubt, worthlessness, unbelief, or negativity which wants you to question your life, your purpose, your desires, and most of all-who God is, and how God feels about you, RESIST IT OUT LOUD! Declare to your enemy the truth you know; what God has revealed to your heart about how He cares for you, how He loves you, and what He created you for-His glory!

From God’s heart to yours:

“Child, you are My glory, I made you just for Me. I am working everything out around you to daily transform you into My glorious image and one day; yes, one day soon, you will know My glory fully in you. You will be restored, and you will be complete.”

I Wanted A Piece Of Fruit; God Gave Me A Smoothie

For the last few days all I have been craving is a good piece of fresh fruit. That doesn’t sound so complicated I suppose….except for one little hitch. I can’t afford to go buy one little piece of fruit right now. It’s not that I don’t have food in my house, or that I have a puffed out bloated tummy like a starving child in Africa. No, I am well fed. It’s just a tough time for us, and right now we have no grocery budget, and have to make due with what we have in the cabinets. None of that happened to be fresh fruit or any type of fruit juice. *sigh* Ok, not the end of the world, I can drink some water and pretend.

When I look at my circumstances, they don’t look desirable. In fact, one could say they “suck”.  Someone told me the other day, “It always seems that bad things happen to good people. And you’re better than me because at least you go to church, and look at all this stuff happening to you. I don’t understand it or think it’s fair. You derserve better.” I suppose if I had entertained that line of thought I could have easily talked myself in to one massive pity party like I have done so many times in the past. But this time I knew it would be different. This time I had trust. This time I was not going to allow my circumstances and the storms of life to affect my attitude and spiral me into a fit of worry. Hey, if I have to live off of cereal and bread for two weeks, then so be it. I’ll live. It could be worse. In the past I would have been freaking out, wringing my hands, upset because I couldn’t eat exactly what I wanted. Upset because I didn’t know how rent was going to be paid or how needs would be met. Having major anxiety attacks and major anger problems. But this time was different. God got ahold of me. I knew that no matter what, I was where He wanted me to be, and He was my Provider. I knew I could trust Him. It might not be what I wanted (No Steak and Shrimp, God??) but it would be what I needed. So I relaxed and let God take care of it. Trusting God didn’t change my circumstances. It changed ME. That’s when the light bulb went on. This whole thing isn’t about crying out to God when I need something and watching him fix it and make my life easier. It’s about trusting Him even when my circumstances DON’T change. It’s about loving Him, praising Him, and fixing my eyes on Him even when everything around me gives me every reason to lose hope. To turn my back and complain. To say “It’s not fair!”  First God wants my undivided attention. He wants my trust in Him, and he doesn’t want that trust to be conditional based on what He is doing for me. Just think…if everything was always so grand in my life, then would I really appreciate or even notice the awesome ways God moves around me? Probably not. God isn’t just in the big things, He is all around me in the little things, in all the details. And he wants me to SEE HIM in it, and PRAISE HIM for it! Every day should be an AWESOME GOD day! Not just the days that are going well, or the successful days or the happy days. God allows these things in my life to show Himself to me in an even more intimate way. What a loving and nurturing God! He says:

“‘I will satisfy with…abundance and my people will be filled with My bounty.’ declares the Lord.'” Jeremiah 31:14(NIV)

Well, you wonder, did your awesome God give you your fruit?? Let me tell you. My dear friend surprised me with a couple bags of groceries, after a day at the park. Along with that was a bag a freshly picked oranges from one of her neighbors trees. When I brought the groceries home and started unloading them, I quickly realized that not only was God involved, but He was ALL OVER this! Every item pulled from these bags was something my family normally eats, and some were things my daughter had been asking for for weeks! Now, mind you, my friend was not aware of any of our normal eating habits, likes or dislikes. All she had was the leading of the Holy Spirit, and she followed it! As my daughter slept during her nap I took one of the bananas my friend gave us, and two of the fresh oranges. Found some ice cream in the freezer, and made myself a wonderfully delightful, fresh fruit smoothie. And as I sat there in the couch in silence reflecting on the awesomeness of my God’s provision I thought, “Hey, all I wanted was a piece of fruit, but God gave me a smoothie!”

What’s my point? Simply this: God allows us to face things in our lives to reveal Himself to us more through our circumstances and through other people. He used a friend of mine today, who I have only known for a few weeks, to greatly bless my family. Her generosity and kindness was God honoring and her faithfulness to Him is no doubt going to be rewarded. But how could she have served unless someone was in need? In the same way, all of us have needs or circumstances, and God makes us, as His children, a perfect match to fulfill those needs in each others lives. We just have to be in tune with the Holy Spirit, and be obedient to His voice. Maybe we should look at trials differently. Maybe we should take a moment to stop, and ask God to show Himself to us. What is it that He wants us to see? Who is it He wants us to help? Who is it that He may use to help us?

The bottom line is that He uses all of us to enrich each other, but ultimately He is the sole Provider, and the sole Caretaker.

“Preserve me, O God: for in Thee do I put my trust.” Psalm 16:1

Preserve-(Hebrew definition)

a prim. root; to hedge about (as with thorns) i.e. to guard; to protect; attend to…etc.-beware, be circumspect, take heed (to self), keep(-er, self), mark, look narrowly, observe, preserve, regard, reserve, save, sure, (that lay) wait (for) watch(-man)

If you look at the original Hebrew definition of “preserve” you see all that it implies. We could re-phrase this verse in many other ways to understand it further, based on this definition, and therefore gain a greater knowledge of how God truly cares for us.

“Mark me, O God…”

“Look narrowly after me, O God…”

“Observe me, O God…”

“Regard me, O God…”

“Save me, O God…”

“Lay wait for me, O God…”

“Be my Watchman, O God…”

“Put a hedge about me with thorns, O God…”

“Protect me, O God…”

“Attend to me, O God…”

“Be my Keeper, O God…”

He IS our Hedge, our Keeper, our Protector, our Attendant, our Watchman….He regards us, He saves us, He observes us, He looks narrowly after us….

What a God!! What is there not to trust? Even in the small things, in the big things, in ANY thing. HE IS THERE, we need to look for HIM, and He will be found. Allow Him to use your circumstances for His glory, before you throw up your hands in frustration. Ask Him to satisfy your soul with His goodness, BEFORE your circumstances change.

“For He satisfieth the longing soul, and filleth the hungry soul with goodness.” Psalm 107:9